We are trained for abuse by society, starting with the family, then school, then the workplace

We need a working definition of abuse. After thinking about it a lot, I come back to "being abused is feeling bad when you've done nothing wrong." Maybe "suffering out of proportion to the infraction." Who decides what is in proportion? Maybe some would say it's in proportion to make a child cry for wetting her pants, even if that is an expected thing for her to do for her age and developmental skill.

The home, schools, and the workplace are hotbeds of abuse.